To mark the start of the World Snooker Championship being held at Sheffield's Crucible Theatre, Matchroom Sport Limited is very proud to announce the launch of its new porn film, Pot the Pink.
The snooker word championships are effectively run by Matchroom Sport Limited, a firm owned by Barry and Eddie Hearn, a father and son partnership. The company is also big in promoting angling, boxing and darts.
Barry and Eddie Hearn are very keen to promote the popularity of snooker worldwide. Snooker has broken into the Chinese sports market, but they are keen for snooker, despite tariffs, to break into the American lucrative but crowded sports market.
A while back, Matchroom Sport Limited approached my agent with a proposition. The company wanted a porn film based on snooker, which it as key as cracking the American market. Its thinking was that porn sells.
The company attached a rider to their very lucrative offer. It didn't want Stormy Daniels to direct the porn film because of her legal battles with the US President. The company wanted me to direct the porn film instead. I had a dilemma. I've never directed a porn film before but I felt this was my time to move up from being a porn star to a porn director. Also, after extensive searches, I found out that Stormy Daniels has no critical minerals nor rare metals to plunder, so I had no scruples in replacing her as director. Money talks!
As well as being the director of the Pot the Pink porn film, I casted myself as the referee in the snooker game. The game was simple. There were to be six men and six women. The film was based on a pool table rather than a snooker table which meant it was much easier to pot balls into a pocket. The six men had six pink balls to shoot into the six pockets.
The six men recruited by the porn company Naughty Nottie Hotties, on my recommendation, were @CallMeMrWrong69, @citizen4722, @CleavageFan4U, @Eviloutlaw1, @OddsAgainst, and @staci_19702. The Americans were immediately placed as favourites by bookmakers to win because the game was to be played on a pool and not on a much larger snooker table.
Per usual, I approached @superbjversion2's School of Fluffology for Gentleman and Harlots for cast members of the Pot the Pink film. Please bear in mind they also had to be fluffers during the film's shoot. Wisely, @superbjversion2 suggested @AuraAviatik6, @EnigmaInitiative, @flannel_light, @LovingOral1964, @PonyGirl1965 and her good self.
@EnyojLife was hired to provide the catering for the film shoot. And, @MiddayMargarita was hired to make cocktails throughout the shoot. Last but not least, @ULikeOral1971 was employed to act as the tournament's compere. All three were easily persuaded to work for constant fluffing throughout the shoot in lieu of them being paid!
This was an all-star porn casting for the porn film. The tournament was sponsored by this site, Adult FriendFinder, but it insisted that the six men, plus the referee, while wearing waistcoats and bow ties, had to be half-naked with their cocks showing. This made for easy fluffing.
The site also insisted that the six women wore matching lingerie though were directed to strip off as the tournament got going.
Each of the six men had six pink balls to shoot into the six pockets on a pool table. But as a twist, a porn twist, the six naked women hovered naked in a certain 'pot the pink' way over the six pockets. The idea was for the pink to be potted twice!
As the referee, my job was to enforce the rules but as there were none, my job was simply to retrieve the pink balls from the pink pockets. However, I did have to disqualify @CleavageFan4U for deliberately and persistently shooting his pink balls at bewbies and not into the pockets!
The bookmakers' favourite, @staci_19702 and popularly known as the Texan Grinder, comfortably won the tournament. Clearly his time in smoke-filled halls shooting billiards, snooker and pool during his misspent youth paid off. His winning shot was what experts called a near impossible shot into a middle pocket from a snookered position while being fluffed.
I won't tell you whose middle pocket it was and what woman had most pink balls potted in her pink pocket. You'll have to watch the film!
Though I didn't get to play, I did pot the pink at the end of the film shoot. Below is a photo of me half-naked potting a pink after the film shoot!
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You have no idea how much I love my job as a fluffer! Thanks for calling me back
Also, I’ve “done it” several times on a pool table, though I’m not sure if it was snooker or some other kind of billiards… I might go check this afternoon, since that table is in a pub just around the corner
The funniest part? I’m not even joking
You are an expert fluffer!
@spunkycumfun Yes I do
@AuraAviatik6 I'm probably going to have to miss your Saturday cam show as I've just been told I've got to look after my two grandkids that day. I hope it goes well; I'm sure it will.
@spunkycumfun
Hi!
Family always comes first! before pleasure!
No worries, there will be more opportunities. I plan to do one of these little shows a couple of times a year, maybe even three, just like in my “previous life”
@AuraAviatik6 My youngest grandson often sits next to me when I'm on the PC. He draws TV heads, toilets and poo. It makes me laugh.
@spunkycumfun yes, I know, privacy and kids don’t match 😀
Porn films I've starred in are The Ribald Tales of Robin Hood (see A HALF-NAKED ROBIN HOOD IN AN AUTUMNAL SHERWOOD FOREST PORN FILM SHOOT and A HALF-NAKED KERFUFFLE IN AN AUTUMNAL SHERWOOD FOREST), U-BOOT VON WOLLUST, DOING MY OWN THING WITH AUDREY HEPBURN, LA GANGBANG FESTIVA DI SOPHIA LOREN A ROMA, LORD BYRON'S BOUDOIR, SPIT-ROAST TALES IN SAINT-TROPEZ, SUITS: THE PRINCESS, HER CUCKOLD HUSBAND AND HER SUITED BULL and POT THE PINK.
As well as porn films, I've appeared in two porn plays, KING LEAR and see THE WINTER'S TALE.
In addition, I've appeared in the Hollywood film, WHEN ERROL FLYNN MET ELLE FANNY.
Also my porn adventures have led to two lucrative appearances in adverts for Acne Studios' Musubi leather bags (see AN X-RATED YARN ABOUT ZITS) and Moët et Chandon champagne alongside Scarlett Johansson (see DOING MY OWN THING ON THE RED CARPET). Plus I appeared as the centrefold in the Good Housekeeping magazine (see GOOD HOUSEKEEPING).
Plus, as a result of my porn exploits, I got to hang out with Rose McGowan (see DOING MY OWN THING ON THE RED CARPET), Stormy Daniels (see A STORM IN A POOL) and Sandra Bullock (see DOING MY OWN THING WITH SANDRA BULLOCK).
You should listen to ACDC " sink the pink". There's a really good cover, with good film clip, by Marcus Nimbler. Awsome story. 😎 👍 👌
@Strezlecki I'll give the song a listen.
I have a pool table in my living room, but never played strip pool. It's being used as one big craft table 😂
You should organise a strip pool tournament!
Growing up, I played a lot of snooker, even served as the barmaid when my brothers had their friends over. However, nothing ever became as raunchy as this!
My snooker games never got that raunchy too!
That looks like a lot of naked fun! 🥳
I never knew playing pool could be so much fun but exhausting!
I had to look up the term compère - learned something new today!
Happy HNW.
I didn't know compere hasn't made it over to America. I guess announcer is used instead.
Seems you directed another great movie my friend. And I never heard of a Snooker table before. But I sure know how to play pool. You have many great helpers here from the site helping you out. Another great tribute to HNW.
I hope your enjoying a very happy and sexy hump day as well..
I'm not a good pool player. It's all pot luck for me. The harder I hit the balls, the more they go in but often the wrong balls go in!
Spunky, your imagination has no bounds!! You may not have any awards like an Oscar or any other in the realm of movies but you have fans of your story telling. Thank you! I needed the laugh today. Cheers!!!
I'm pleased I raised a cheer.
Those pictures make me want to take up playing Snooker again.
I hope you get to pot some pink balls soon!
You seem to have done well with your new career move...better than Kubrick or Coppola.
I'm still haven't won an Oscar yet!
@spunkycumfun It's not an Oscar but ...
In the category of Best Director in a Fake Porn Film the BJ goes to Spunky Cum Fun!
the crowd goes wild
@superbjversion2 That's even better than an Oscar!
@OddsAgainst Now that would look good on my mantelpiece!
Excellent work. 👍 👌
Many thanks.