Too much dopamine

Dopamine is the feel good happy chemical in our bodies... can bring up the level by exercising or seeing the favourite food or people we love, etc.

Well, a network educator friend recently told me she saw my ex lover DOST in person, he has gained a lot of weight plus seemed to aged a lot since he ghosted me to break up with me 2 years ago. She even show me his tik tok media. And yes, in his latest video, he did gained a lot of weight... and he choose to hide his face using a cat head (Pete the Cat) he painted for his school's library theme for the students.

She remarked that he used to be so proud, thinking he's the white guy/expat coming here to work and fool around with so many women. She was also mad at him because she knew how he made used of my kindness when I welcomed him to my country, teaching him any he wants to know about SG, etc... yet dumped me aside when he has more choices after staying here for the past 7 years.

Anyway, I don't feel much for DOST anymore. He has chosen to give me up despite I devoted 5 years to him and I have accepted his decision after slowly pulling myself out of the heartbreak. Time will heal my pains... He was my weight loss buddy and now it seems he too, not doing much to help himself to be healthier.

And beside, now I have a cute expat Doctor who comes on rounds every month and paid me a little more attention, I'm already very happy to have a new crush whom I can secretly admire at a safe healthy distance! That's good enough! Plus this Doctor inspired me more to get healthier with my weight loss too. Sometimes my nottie self might fantasized a little over him... as he bring out that nottie girl in me who loves to tease a man in lingerie when my dopamine level raised like crazy after seeing him.

Something like this MV from Thai, my favourite mixed blood singer Tata Young. Check it out!

P/S: There's problem loading... you can goggle Tata Young - El Nin-YO! to see it on youtube.